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I know… I keep harping on Edwards, but he’s right here in my backyard…

John Edwards Vows To End All Bad Things By 2011
The Onion
July 16, 2007 | Issue 43-29

AMES, IA—In an effort to jump-start a presidential campaign that still has not broken into the top Democratic tier, former Sen. John Edwards made his most ambitious policy announcement yet at a campaign event in Iowa Monday: a promise to eliminate all unpleasant, disagreeable, or otherwise bad things from all aspects of American life by the end of his second year in office.

“Many bad things are not just bad—they’re terrible,” said a beaming Edwards, whose…

The rest of the story…

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